Hello, Europe, it’s the United Kingdom calling…

“Euphoria, forever until the end of time, from now on, only you and I, we’re going u-u-u-u-u-u-up…” – Loreen, Euphoria (the Swedish Eurovision entry).

Tomorrow night sees the final of Europe’s favourite TV show, which sees twenty six countries battling it out to become Europe’s best at the newly-built Crystal Hall in Baku, Azerbaijan. Forty two started the competition and now, after two semi-finals, twenty six remain. Malta are back in the final after about three years, The Netherlands didn’t qualify for the eighth year in a row, Ireland have the evil twins representing them yet again and there are about six fitties in the final. (Any one of them winning/doing well will do me.)

Sadly for my six fit guys (who, by the way, represent Germany, Serbia, Iceland, Malta, Norway and Estonia, in case you’re wondering), however, the favourites to win are all female. There’s Nina Zilli for Italy with L’Amore È Femmina (Out Of Love), Pastora Soler with Quédate Conmigo and, bookies’ favourite, Loreen, with Euphoria (see above), all of which are brilliant songs and, as I’ve mentioned them in greater detail in a previous blog post featuring my personal favourites and top ten (which doesn’t include Malta, though their song is brilliant as well), I won’t say much about them in this one. I’ll just say they’re brilliant.

We, however, have Engelbert Humperdinck representing us and, whilst I like the song, I have to say we have no chance of winning again this year. Not whilst the talentless clowns that are Jedward are back in the running, anyway. I don’t really care who wins as long as it’s not those two. Ireland have let me down again this year.

I’ll laugh if the Buranovski Grannies and their spinning oven beat them, though…

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